When a married couple divorces, the parents may have to deal with a lot of stress, but the children also have a lot to deal with.
Dealing with a youngster in such a delicate position can have an exponential amount of consequences.
Psychological effect
Children whose parents are divorced are more prone to suffer from sadness, anxiety, and stress.
They are frequently concerned as a result of witnessing their parents quarrel and bicker prior to their divorce.
They also don’t like being yelled at, therefore they try to avoid being influenced by it by running away.
She claims that this is not always the case for some children. Some adopt a defense mechanism based on what they seen from their parents:
they can’t bear being resisted, therefore fighting back and defending themselves comes naturally to them due to a lack of control.
Intellectual effect
Most divorced parents, according to Kayitesi, do not follow up on their children following their divorce. As a result, students may get disengaged from their academics and lose interest in putting out effort at school.
Some children who find up living with stepparents who have other children experience family difficulties.
To avoid conflicts, parents cannot be strict with their stepchildren, which has an impact on their education and behavior, she explains.
Social effect
“Because of what their parents went through, children of divorce are afraid of being social and even dating.”
They believe that what happened to their parents will also happen to them. They are frightened of getting married because they believe their spouses will beat them up or do it, and they are persuaded that, like their parents, they will not have stability,” the psychopathologist explains.
Counsel for parents
According to Monique Mukamana, a community and family-based support specialist, divorced parents should make sure that their disagreements don’t prevent them from carrying out their responsibilities.
Divorce, according to lawyer Innocent Munanira, does not relieve parents of their responsibilities; they must continue to fulfill them in line with the law.
“Even after a divorce, parents are obligated to pay school fees and meet all of their children’s fundamental necessities.”
When parents refuse to comply, Mukamana believes they should first talk to them and help them recover.
We assist them in moving on, overcoming their anger and sadness so that they can care for their children. She adds that depending on the age of the children, they are also consulted to help them understand that even though their parents are divorced, they still love them.
In each district, the Child Development Agency employs a social affairs and psychology specialist.
“These experts encourage parents to prioritize their children and develop ways to deal with their circumstances in order to prevent involving them in conflicts, which can lead to melancholy and anger.”